It has been hard these days since he passed away on May 24, 2012. Now that all the funeral arrangements are done, the doctor appointments are over, and the treatments are no longer an option to listen to for hope, and friends and family have stopped coming over to check on our family, it is real.
Dad is gone! Even though he is with God in heaven and has no more pain from kidney cancer along with all the tumors and eight years of struggle, I still wish I could talk to him.
I thought I was prepared since I had eight great years when the doctors told us two months. I was mistaken you can't bypass grief because it will find you.
The great part about being so far in my healing journey is I recognized when it was time to reach out for help. Today I visited my psychiatrist to increase my medication for a short time so I can get through the hard times and also increased my counseling sessions to two times a week to help with grieving.
You can be this far along too, if you start your healing journey today. It is hard work but worth it.